Seattle Community

Business coaching services
Portland, Oregon
Extraordinarily helpful
out of 10
9 votes

5 Ways Easy Ways to Find More People Who Need Your Help

If you want to help more people and get more clients, look at my 5 point list. It will show you an easy way to begin your plan to grow your business and have consistent money flow.
Written Dec 12, 2010, read 1847 times since then.


“I love what I do, but no one is hiring me and I feel stuck!”

I hear these words over and over from my clients who have a wonderful service, but are struggling to bring in consistent cash flow.

What do all these small business owners have in common? They have all:

1. Completed excellent training.
2. Expertise in their tools.
3. Passion about what they offer.
4. Skill at their technique. 
5. Commitment to their service.

If this sounds at all like you, read on!

The five point list above is positive and a true achievement. However, it also is the very five things that could be causing a challenge in growing your business and finding more people to help.

This probably sounds strange because it would seem logical that if you are good at what you do and offer huge help, why wouldn't scads of people being knocking on your door?

Nevertheless if you re-read the five point list, you will notice it is all about you, your skills, your training and your passion. This might come as a shock, but your clients don't really care about you, your background and those five things. 

Your clients care about themselves and these other five things:

1. How they are feeling. 
2. What they want.  
3. What their issues are. 
4. How they wish they felt.
5. How they wish things were better.  

It all about them and their life, their problems, obstacles and how to overcome them. They are self-focused on their situation and how it is affecting their life. 

Many of the business owners who fit into the first five point list up above, cannot easily articulate or elaborate on their client's five point list.  This is a big problem. 

I talked to a new client yesterday and she launched into her business owner list with clarity and excitement.  She told me all about her programs and her services. We looked at her website together and the first link in the menu was, “about me,” and told all about her training and expertise. The home page was more like an article about how her process worked to make positive change for people. I could tell she spent a lot of time writing it and she was proud of what she did.

When I asked her who those people were that would benefit from her services and to share  with me the client five point list, her confidence plummeted and she became very vague and unsure. She could only guess and hope. In her mind, she assumed if she focused on her expertise and explained it clearly, the people who needed her help would connect and come. However, that wasn't happening, and she felt  discouraged.

She wondered what she was doing wrong. 

This is what I told her to do. Five easy steps!

•  Interview people who she “thinks” might benefit from her help.
•. Ask them to explain their five point list.
•  Listen actively to what they say.
•  Take good notes.
•  Notice the patterns.

Unless someone outright asks, don't talk about yourself or your services and even then- keep it very short as the purpose is to listen to them and learn. 

From this process, information begins to develop and your ability to empathize and understand their situation emerges. Just to make sure, paraphrase back to them what you heard and see if you got it right!

It will be like magic as you  begin to change your focus from yourself and your five point list, to their list. Once you do this, you will be on the road to developing a marketing plan that will work to help you get paying clients and a business that thrives. 

Eventually your passion will be about helping these people in whatever way will help them. You will be able to develop more income streams and find a million ways to offer great services that people want.



Learn more about the author, Kaya Singer.

Comment on this article

  • Small Business SEO Expert 
Boulder, Colorado 
Reid Peterson
    Posted by Reid Peterson, Boulder, Colorado | Dec 12, 2010

    Thanks for your insights, Kaya. One thing that comes to mind is the concept of "trust." After reading your article, I couldn't help but wonder how potential clients would trust you if they only know of you as the solution to their problem.

    I've tried to focus 110% on a potential client (responding to their needs, marketing to their needs, listening more, and educating) but have experienced results of rejection. I wonder if you have a strategy of how to be yourself (proud of the services you offer) and also communicate in ways that meet the needs of potential clients?

  • spiritual intuitive, psychic medium, energy healer, angel channel 
San Diego, California 
Suzy Morgan
    Posted by Suzy Morgan, San Diego, California | Dec 12, 2010

    I ask prospects what they are looking for; what they would like to accomplish. I notice that women (my clients) don't always know. They know what they don't want.

    I also notice that many women "wish things were better," but are afraid to stand up for themselves until the wolf is at the door and eating its way through the keyhole. Even then we women seem to try to squeeze ourselves into even smaller spaces. I have done it myself.

    My niche is female-focused, and so often, women do not seem to know who they are and what would comprise a happy life for them.

    How do you overcome what you are unwilling to see? For me, making my female clients aware, gently, that they do have feelings that they are not being expressed, is important.

    I am realizing that I provide a safe place for allowing my client to feel who she is underneath her emotional camouflage. It is only with allowing herself to feel who she really is, that she will be able to create change.

    You are reminding me, Kaya, that once again, the process has not much to do with me. It is all about my client and how I am here to support her in whatever way works. It's what you do for me.

  • Business coaching services 
Portland, Oregon 
Kaya Singer
    Posted by Kaya Singer, Portland, Oregon | Dec 12, 2010

    Reid- Thank you so much for your comments. I always enjoy hearing from you. You brought up an excellent point. The five point reality check I share in this article is the very beginning of a good marketing plan. You certainly have to do all the other 6 parts as well as shown my marketing circle.

    Here are a few more things to think about. You need to be known to your clients as someone who "understands" their problem and what they "want". It is not about being someone who has a solution. I know this sounds counter-productive but solutions are still about you. Sales comes much later in the process. You have to build empathy first and gently give people a taste. If they don't want the taste you are offering - you could be marketing to the wrong group or its the right group but you are missing what they want. I am just making guesses.

    I always remind my clients. You have to give people what they want, and then once they are working with you offer them what they need.

  • Business coaching services 
Portland, Oregon 
Kaya Singer
    Posted by Kaya Singer, Portland, Oregon | Dec 12, 2010

    Suzy- Thanks so much for your sharing as well. Even if your clients are confused and don't know what they want - you seem to understand that, and that is what you empathize with. They get it!

    You are a natural empathizer and people feel it. Now you just have to use that to keep developing your marketing.

  • Marketing Consultant 
Nanuet, New York 
Julie Weishaar
    Posted by Julie Weishaar, Nanuet, New York | Dec 13, 2010

    Hi Kaya,

    Wonderful insight as always from you. It isn't about "me" - it is always about "them". We have to be sure to make sure our message and our services are fulfilling a need in our customers and potential customers. Perception is pretty important here too. We might "think" we are giving them but they want but it doesn't matter what we think - it only matters how "they" perceive" what we are say and doing.

    Thanks for sharing your insights!

  • Business coaching services 
Portland, Oregon 
Kaya Singer
    Posted by Kaya Singer, Portland, Oregon | Dec 13, 2010

    Thanks Julie I always enjoy hearing from you too. Yes- I like your point about the perception. There's nothing like just asking them!

  • Consultant 
Bangalore, Karnataka India 
Fernandez G
    Posted by Fernandez G, Bangalore, Karnataka India | Dec 13, 2010

    Thanks for educated!

  • Principal 
New York, New York 
Michelle Gorenstein
    Posted by Michelle Gorenstein, New York, New York | Dec 13, 2010

    Hi Kaya, Thanks for the reminder about how to connect to my prospects. As I'm getting my marketing plan in place for 2011, it's helpful to take a look back at the last year and see where I got that right, and where I need to improve. I think I'm going to take you suggestion to check-in with a couple of clients, see where they are on that 5-point list, and use that as a starting point.

  • spiritual intuitive, psychic medium, energy healer, angel channel 
San Diego, California 
Suzy Morgan
    Posted by Suzy Morgan, San Diego, California | Dec 13, 2010

    I frequently watch Sandra D'Amato or whatever her name is on the Home & Garden channel. Unlike all the other realtors, she does what I am working on. First she asks what the prospect's expectations are. What they want. Gradually she helps them see that their dreams and their budget don't match. She doesn't tell them. She shows them.

    What is so different about her approach is she tells the prospect why she picked out a particular property for them. After they have looked at the property on their own, she goes in to discuss it.

    She ALWAYS ask them what they thought. What they liked. What they didn't like so she can adjust her choices for the next house. I almost never do that with my clients. My client seems happy and I know what magic I've performed. But I forget to ask. Referrals come from ask to understand if I have missed something for them. Then I can at least cover it next time.

  • Hotel Operator, business developer, designer, environmental consultant 
Spring Green, Wisconsin 
Carolina Dursina
    Posted by Carolina Dursina, Spring Green, Wisconsin | Dec 15, 2010

    As always, it's been a great pleasure to read your article; there is always so much essence to it, that I have to read it twice to grasp more and use what I learned reading it. Great insight!

  • Business coaching services 
Portland, Oregon 
Kaya Singer
    Posted by Kaya Singer, Portland, Oregon | Dec 15, 2010

    Michelle- Thanks for your comments. I always learn so much when I ask my clients good open-ended questions. Their questions often help me to know what to write about in my blog posts too. So good luck and let me know how it goes.

    Suzy- good points. It is funny how something so simple as asking can slip your mind. Like you said- you know they are happy but people love to be asked :)

    Carolina- thanks so much for your kind thoughts.

  • SEO Consultant 
Jersey City, New Jersey 
Elvis Arias
    Posted by Elvis Arias, Jersey City, New Jersey | Dec 15, 2010

    thanks kaya for the very practical advice

  • IT Consulting, IT Support 
Seattle, Washington 
James Murray
    Posted by James Murray, Seattle, Washington | Dec 18, 2010


    I think you've made some great points. When I started writing a mentor mentioned to me that as he got older he wrote better books. Not because he was a better writer, but because he didn't have to put in all the pieces that showed his credibility.

    Once he focused on the subject and did not include the proof of his credibility for writing the book... his books became more concise and one third the size of his older books.

    I think that happens in everything. We have to prove to our clients that we are good enough to talk to them about the subject. Then forget to tell why the subject is important.

    I’ve noticed that when I stop talking and start listening, I hear the benefits the customer is looking for. Then share a solution they might not have thought of. Then suddenly their face lights up and they start asking me questions. My training, experience etc seldom come up.

    At least when I remember to keep my mouth shut and listen.

    Great article!

    Thanks, James

  • Business coaching services 
Portland, Oregon 
Kaya Singer
    Posted by Kaya Singer, Portland, Oregon | Dec 18, 2010

    James- thanks for chiming in with your good points.

    I like your attitude:) "Keep your mouth shut and listen." Funny how obvious that is but hard to do sometimes!