Confused Networking vs. Strategic Networking

Have you ever felt unsure of what to say or do at a networking event? Or, felt confused about your message and unsure if the people you meet will remember you? Planning and practice are just what the doctor ordered!

Written Apr 11, 2008, read 1175 times since then.

Confused networking will lead to confusing results. When you actually plan for your networking time, you will find that you have better results.

What do I mean by confused networking?

Well, confused networking happens in several ways. First, you may be going to an event without knowing who else will be there, or what the topic of conversation will be, or what the common theme is that holds this particular "tribe" together. You may have decided that you need or should go to this event because someone else suggested it. But deep down, you really don't know why you are going. But go you will. And you may walk around at the event feeling like you are out of place, out of synch, and certainly out of sorts. And all of that contributes to the fact that you just don't know what to say. Which is the # 1 reason why people hate to go to Networking events. They really don't like the discomfort that comes from not knowing what to say.

Another way that confusion slips into networking is that many people don't know how to talk about their businesses so other people will listen. Many of these folks have not taken the time to know for certain who their best client is. The clue to this kind of confusion is when they say very general things to describe their perfect client. That might sound something like this, "Anyone with a backbone is a good client for me." Or perhaps, "Anyone with skin is a good client for me." This might sound cute and get a laugh or two ... but it is not instructive enough to allow someone hearing this to realize who specifically could benefit from that person's service or product.

My friend, Fred Gleeck, always says, "A confused mind ALWAYS says NO," and in this case (well, in any case) I would agree.

Help people not be confused about what it is that you do, who you serve, and how you serve them. Be specific when you talk about the types of clients you would like to have referred to you.

Here are some tips to help you cut down on this type of confusion:

Take a mental snapshot of your current clients
Sort out the ones who make your "heart sing" and add joy to your day
What in particular do you like about these clients?
What do they look like? Where do they live? Where do they work?
What pain do these clients typically feel?
How do they demonstrate that pain?
How do you solve their pain?
And what is the outcome of them either working with you or using your product?

When you can answer these questions for yourself, you've created a mini-profile of who your preferred or favorite customer is. You can easily, then, let other people in on the secret of who you like to work with and who you would like more referrals to. End of confusion regarding how people can help you and you are well on your way to improving the client flow in your business.

And, in case you are wondering how to clear up the first kind of confusion ... about not knowing why you are at a particular event. It's called research. When someone tells you that you really ought to check out this group or that organization, please consider asking some pointed questions.

Here are some to help you get started on understanding if a networking group is right for you:

What is the agenda for the event or how does the event flow?
What is the philosophy of the group? What are the underlying reasons for this group to exist?
Are there rules or protocol that you should be aware of?
Are there guides in place to help a non-member or new person feel welcome?
Is information provided so you know what to expect, and how to participate?
Who typically attends these events?
Is it free style networking or structured networking?
Are non-members or guests allowed to participate or are they just observing?
Are there suggested strategies to assist you in having a good experience?
Who are the officers and/or volunteers?

When you get the answers to these and other questions that you may have, you can better decide where and when to get involved with building relationships that will increase your network. Most of this information can be found online or by asking the person that told you about the event or the group.

Once you've done your personal research (who is my preferred client) and researched the group, you will have all the information you need to begin the conversations that will help people learn about you, get to know you, grow to like you, and ultimately come to trust you.

When you've taken these suggested steps, you will have eased or ended your own confusion which will prevent you from leaking confusion to others. You will talk in very specific ways about who you serve and how you serve. And networking karma will help to attract what you are looking for in more specific ways!

The truly sweet spot in all of this, is that when you get really clear about what you do, you begin to realize that you can also ask very specific questions of others to help draw out this same information from them. Which then makes it really easy to have quality conversations anywhere you go. And you'll no longer worry about what to say for you will know the precise questions that will draw others out into enjoyable conversations with you. For remember, people do business with people they know, like, and trust ... and you are well on your way to all of that!

Zita Gustin helps business people realize the many opportunities presented through social contact (whether online or face 2 face) to spread the word about their businesses.

www.thesavvynetworker.com provides many tips and ideas for GREAT connections.

Learn more about the author, Zita Gustin.

Comment on this article

Posted by Karen Fitzgerald, Long Island City, Queens, New York | Apr 14, 2008

Hi Zita, Sage advice. I enjoyed reading these tips - they gave me greater clarity around the issues that come up for me regarding networking. And they translate neatly to online networking!

Best wishes, Karen Fitzgerald www.Fitzgeraldart.com
Posted by Kim Pearson, Issaquah, Washington | Apr 14, 2008

Good article, Zita, about how you do what you do so well. Thanks for sharing your tips.
Posted by Frances Ann Ade, Bellevue, Washington | Apr 14, 2008

Well put, Zita. Thank you for your clear-headed and well-written advice!
Posted by Lara Eve Feltin, Seattle, Washington | Apr 14, 2008

Great points! Your article got my brain turning - not only can we do a better job of communicating what Biznik is to new members, it might be helpful to create a page for what to expect at your first Biznik event.

Biznik Business Networking, Co-founder
Posted by Ilise Benun, Hoboken, New Jersey | Apr 14, 2008

Love this one too, Zita.

It reminds me of something I heard Barbara Winter talk about this weekend at the Changing Course "Work at What You Love" Workshop (I quoted her on my blog too). She talked about creating a natural monopoly and described it this way:

"Focus on finding those prospects that you're a perfect fit for and you'll start building this natural monopoly. You want to be so appropriate for your customers that the competition virtually disappears. You'll also find that this helps take away the sting of rejection, when a prospect doesn't go with you. You'll end up saying to yourself, 'Gee, they just weren't the perfect fit for me.'"
Posted by Nancy Juetten, Bellevue, Washington | Apr 15, 2008

Fabulous tips. Loved every one of them. Thank you for sharing.
Posted by Cathy Goodwin, Seattle, Washington | Apr 17, 2008

Very good. Networking participants may or may not e in your target market.
Posted by Carol Carini, Auburn, Washington | Apr 17, 2008

Thanks Zita, you're a valuable resource.
Posted by Judy Friend, Pepperell , Massachusetts | Apr 17, 2008

Great article Zita. Networking is so vital in any business and feeling comfortable helps move past the dragons! Thanks for sharing your expertise!
Posted by Dawn Renee Mallory, Seattle, Washington | Apr 17, 2008

Great Stuff! I made myself a little worksheet out of the information points and am "having at it" before my next event... which is in 2 hours!!!

Please send me your flaky friends!
Posted by Mike Mitte, Edmonds, Washington | Apr 17, 2008

This is great information on these networking events. I guess there are a few of us who don’t like the venue; groups. We tend to shy away from groups and operate much better one on one. It isn’t because we don’t know what we do and why it is valuable. Many of us just are not comfortable in a large group. I managed sales people for years and many of my top sales people did not do well in large groups but excelled in small meetings and one on one. Some of my sales people brought me in to do the stand-up presentation rather than face a crowd. I would really like to see an event were the attendees gathered and spend a few minutes, maybe five one on one with each other getting acquainted. I’m not sure how this would be done, but maybe 10 small tables with people rotating every five minutes? I think this would benefit everyone and would provide each of us with the opportunity to really make a connection. If someone comes up with an event like this please let me know and I will be there.

Thanks again I enjoyed the article.

Mike
Posted by Dana Henrickson, Seattle, Washington | Apr 17, 2008

Nice article. All these tips help us to better separate the grain from the chaff in terms of delineating our purpose and our desired clientele.

Thanks.
Posted by Roberta MacLaren, Gresham, Oregon | Apr 17, 2008

This is in response to Mike Mitte.

I saw your post about your feelings regarding being able to talk more one-on-one to other attendees, a round table format.

I was so excited about your post, then noticed that you are in Lynnwood and I am in Portland/Gresham, because I belong to a great group that has what can be termed as "power networking" or "speed networking" like speed-dating! Anyway, I just love the concept. I personally call it "forced networking!" But it really works well and takes all the anxiety out of the event. One knows what to expect, and everyone is there for the basic same reason. It is really hard to break into a group when they are already in conversation - about anything other than business.

I hope people see and read your message and let you know of events like that in your area. I know you would like it.

And Zita your ideas and suggestions are right on target! Great information, especially about asking questions in relation to the networking group. It is like an interview process or a mutual benefit for both the attendee and the group.

For the group I belong in the Portland Metro area visit http://www.connectionsnetworking.com and happy networking!

Roberta Mac Laren, Marketing Consultant http://www.zebragraphics.net
Posted by Kare Anderson, Sausalito, California | Apr 17, 2008

Clearly you resonated with the aboe people ane with me. Many thanks!
Posted by Stacy Karacostas, Seattle, Washington | Apr 18, 2008

Gret advice as always!

Thanks for sharing Zita!!

Stacy

Grab my FREE REPORT on the 7 Deadliest Marketing Sins
Posted by Eva Schuster, South Lee, Massachusetts | Apr 18, 2008

Hi Zita, thank you very much for your article. I'm new to network marketing and being self employed and your suggestions for the homework are very helpful.

thanks a lot, Eva
Posted by Karen Rosenzweig, Edmonds, Washington | Apr 19, 2008

nice job Zita, your wisdom continues to amaze me!
Posted by Gene Dexter, Seattle, Washington | Apr 19, 2008

Great post. Thanks.
Posted by Sherri Edwards, Seattle, Washington | Apr 21, 2008

Excellent information! Thank you!
Posted by Vicki Elam, Klamath Falls, Oregon | May 06, 2008

Wonderful article Zita! Very informative and you give awesome advice!

Vicki
Posted by Amy Centers, Bellevue, Washington | Jun 16, 2008

I especially liked this piece:

"My friend, Fred Gleeck, always says, "A confused mind ALWAYS says NO," and in this case (well, in any case) I would agree.

Help people not be confused about what it is that you do, who you serve, and how you serve them."

I agree that business representatives must hone their message so that the service to the other person is clear and resonates.

Thanks, Zita!

Amy