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Grow Your Business by Conquering Your Fear of Rejection
This article is for people who want to start a business, or have one that isn't going anywhere, because fear is holding them back.
Are you denying yourself the opportunity to grow and prosper in your own business because you fear rejection? In fact, is the fear of rejection so great that it’s holding you back from getting your business to the next level?
Here is my advice: Get over yourself! Life is for living…and far too short. Don’t let the end of your life come and be one of regrets. Get out there now - live your passion and share your gifts with the world. Okay, easier said than done for some, but I’m going to walk you through some exercises that will help you realize there is really nothing to fear, but fear itself. Now that the tough talk is done let’s move on.
Are you three feet from gold?
In Napoleon Hill’s book, Think and Grow Rich, there is a chapter entitled: Three feet from gold. He goes on to tell the story of a man who was determined to find his fortune in mining for gold. With some back breaking labor this man found a nugget and got his friends to help by investing in machinery and their labor. Initially all was going well. They only needed a few more cars of gold to pay off their initial investment and the rest would be profit. Unfortunately, they drilled to no avail. The mine was dry and eventually sold as “junk” for a few hundred dollars. The individual who purchased the “junk mine” hired an engineer who understood fault lines and determined the drilling was off by three feet. The adjustment was made and the junk mine purchaser became a millionaire.
Your fear of rejection is leading you down the wrong fault line. There is no gold there. Yes, as a business person we all realize that they are temporary delays, defeats, and yes, sometimes even failures. But, the worst failure of all is to never try! So, let’s get you up and moving toward your own fault line of gold.
You started, or want to start, a business for reasons likely only known to you. Whether that reason was need for additional income, a calling, or just something you’ve always wanted to do, it doesn’t matter. What matters is your “why” behind it. Think about what inspired you to move, or want to move, forward with your business idea.
Don’t Take It Personally
Women tend to take things personally. In business, this is the wrong thing to do. Rejection is more than just a word – it’s an internal enemy. You are giving it far too much power and meaning. Your fear of rejection is holding you back from accomplishing all that is right and what you desire.
Don’t Let Fear Paralyze You
You are in business to sell a product or service. You are in sales, whether you meet directly with the public or not. Your fear surrounds being approached by someone who is interested in buying, someone that doesn’t want to buy, or someone that doesn’t even know about your product. Fear can be paralyzing if you let it.
Think of your next potential customers as friends you’ve yet to make. They are simply people who put their pants on the same way you do. They are human. Every human being is in sales – the potential for rejection is, and has always been there. Think about it. Throughout life we are constantly either trying to convince others of something, trying to impress, or working to get what we want by the path of least resistance (if mom says “No”, ask dad). As a teen ager, going out with the girlfriends or on your first job interview you spent hours on your hair, makeup and wardrobe because your goal was to “impress”. As we got older, had families, many of us were just too busy to care that every hair was in place and our wardrobe was 10 years old. We felt that people needed to understand that our priority was something greater than ourselves. People worth your time and effort, really do understand and accept you for who you really are. So you see, there is nothing to be afraid of.
All things being equal, people want to do business with their friends.
The best thing you can do is to be a friend. No one ever has too many friends. We all classify our friends into groups, close friends, acquaintances, business, etc. Some we tell our secrets to, others we are far more selective about what we share. But at the end of the day, somewhere on our own unwritten chart, there is a name and each individual has a place. Build your business with the intent of acquiring more friends. Friends are not to be feared, but cherished.
So, are you ready to begin? Below are questions that you should take time to answer thoughtfully (there are no wrong answers – only your answers) and honestly. No one is going to see this information but you. Don’t rush through each question but give due consideration before answering. Ultimately, this exercise should get you back on the path to what motivated you in the first place to begin your business. What was, and hopefully still is the driving force that makes you to want to succeed?
- Write down all the things in life you are grateful for. First list generally, e.g., friends, family, a particular moment or event, your business (idea), etc.
2. Take time to explore why you are grateful for everyone and everything you just listed.
3. What was your original motivation to succeed in your business? What was the driving force behind you? (The no matter what, I’m going to make this happen attitude.) example, did you need to succeed because your monthly housing rent depended on it? Are their people depending on your business success, e.g., you support business women in third-world countries? Like bathing, you should practice motivation every day. You will feel better and those around you will come to appreciate you more for it.
4. Take a piece of paper and draw a line in the center from top to bottom. At the top in one column write “challenges” and on the other write “opportunities”. First write down all the things you feel are challenges for you. Then go back and write down the opportunities that are on the other side awaiting you once you figure out a way to overcome the challenges.
5. If you need assistance to overcome some of your challenges, go through your list of friends and identify those most likely to be in a position to help you, whether is just advice or more.
6. After going through these exercises you may need to re- create your “why” – what gets you up in the morning excited to be in business. And that’s OK. What’s important is to recognize that this is needed and do it. It’s not about perfection, it’s about action.
Just remember, your fear of rejection is actually robbing you of finding your own gold mine. Don’t let it!
Sandra Lee Williams living in Qawra, Malta
Wea;thy Woman Living Internationally
Learn more about the author, Sandra Williams.
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- living internationally