<p>People today have a short fuse. Everyone is stressed. When people are stressed, they can become difficult to be around. Have you ever worked with a difficult person? You know the symptoms: Difficult people have a bad attitude, are apathetic, can’t handle change, and aren’t good with customer service. They give you the silent treatment or are verbally aggressive. The burning question is: “Why do we tolerate difficult people?”</p>
<p><strong>Addressing bad behavior in a tactful but effective way:</strong></p>
<p>If you don’t address the behavior, you will find one of two things will happen.</p>
<p>1. Employees will become resentful and think less of you as a leader.</p>
<p><strong>2. </strong>Employees will start modeling the behavior of the person that is not being corrected. <strong></strong></p>
<p><strong>Changing the way things are:</strong></p>
<p>Confrontation is hard for everyone. Understand, however, that dealing with the issue will facilitate a more harmonious atmosphere in the office.</p>
<p>You’ll need to set boundaries, expectations and put guidelines into place, and then hold the person accountable.</p>
<p><strong>Boundaries, expectation and guidelines:</strong></p>
<p><strong>Owner or Manager: </strong> have you ever had an employee who was demanding, condescending to other staff, abrupt, tearful, insecure, and high maintenance? And yet she did an excellent job? Were you worried about losing her because she did an excellent job? Just because someone does great work doesn’t make them a good employee. If you have a person whose behavior is affecting the morale in the office, and you’ve already coached the employee on the issue, this person needs a formal corrective review.</p>
<p>The employee should be given a copy of the corrective review; a signed copy is placed in their employee file. Let the employee know the specific behavior you need to have changed, your clearly defined expectations and a time frame that he or she has to work within. Have a follow up meeting within that designated time period to give the employee the feedback they need. Be sure to provide clear oversight.</p>
<p><strong>Employee</strong>: What if the difficult person is your boss or manager? Approach your employer or supervisor by first asking: “I need to talk with you about something. Is this a good time?” If it’s not, schedule a time to talk. Begin by expressing your intention and your motives. Explain that you’re concerned about a loss of business and unhappy clients, and that your intentions are to help make the workplace not only productive, but one that exceeds the client’s expectations.</p>
<p>Or, talk about how certain behaviors in the office are decreasing efficiency and that you’d like to talk about ways to improve the systems in the office. By first addressing the issues as though you’re tackling a problem or a system issue, your supervisor or employer will not be defensive. Always be tactful, calm and polite. Ask your employer or manager for their goals and offer to give suggestions to help meet those goals.</p>
<p>Use the “<strong>feel, felt, found</strong>” method: “Many of our customers feel uncomfortable when you speak to the other employees; they’ve expressed about how they’ve felt when you left the room. I’ve found that if I convey customer concerns to my supervisor, that our sales have increased.”</p>
<p><strong>Employee to Employee</strong>: If you have a problem with a co-worker, the best first step is to go to that person directly. Do not talk about the issues with your fellow co-workers behind the other person’s back! Go to the person privately and tell them about it.</p>
<p>There are three parts to this.</p>
<p>1. Let the person know that you’d like to talk about something that’s been bothering you. “Is this a good time?”</p>
<p>2. Describe the behavior with dates, names and times. Be specific. Begin by saying: “I’d like to talk with you about this. This is how I felt when….” Speak only for yourself and how the behavior affects you.</p>
<p>3. Describe what you would like to see changed. Try to resolve the issue first personally and privately. If the situation does not change, request a meeting between yourself, the other person and your employer.</p>
<p>In summary: Everyone can choose their attitude. Every day, when someone walks out the front door to go to work, that person has a choice in how their day will play out. You can choose the people that surround you. If you have a difficult person in your life, set the boundaries, let them know your expectations and then hold that person accountable. Be calm when you’re doing this! The person who is calm and asks the questions is in control.</p>
2009-04-01T16:23:08Z
2009-04-04T05:32:43Z
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keeping-your-cool-dealing-with-difficult-people
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2009-04-04T05:30:41Z
2009-04-04T05:32:43Z
Difficult people have a bad attitude, are apathetic, can’t handle change, and aren’t good with customer service. They give you the silent treatment or are verbally aggressive. The burning question is: “Why do we tolerate difficult people?”
Keeping Your Cool: Dealing with Difficult People
1
2009-04-04T05:32:43Z