Lessons from crabs about why we must be vulnerable in life and at work

What do crabs know that we humans have trouble understanding? What? Have no idea? The blunt truth is that crabs willingly make themselves vulnerable in order to grow. Do you?

Written Mar 05, 2009, read 698 times since then.

What do crabs know that we humans have trouble understanding?

What? Have no idea?

Neither did I, until Dov Baron explained this phenomenon. The blunt truth is that crabs willingly make themselves vulnerable in order to grow.

It’s a strange paradox that many of us have difficulty — some are openly resistant to even the idea — allowing ourselves to be vulnerable when we may cognitively know that growth (both personally and professionally) requires the courage to be vulnerable.

The word "vulnerable" comes from the Latin vulnerare, which means "to wound." It is said that the word may also be related to vellere, which means "to pluck, to tear."

Well, doesn't that sound fun?

No wonder we entrepreneurs -- when confronted with new or uncomfortable circumstances -- tend to create protective walls for ourselves, carefully designed to conceal any perceived weakness.

The common crab, however, can teach us a thing or two about the value of embracing risk and vulnerability, in the interests of growth. I dare say that learning lessons from crabs can make a life-and-death difference in your business.

What I didn’t know about crabs (that once mentioned to me I see as plainly obvious) is that their skeleton (called an exoskeleton) is on the outside of their bodies. It is hard and inflexible, and it’s main function is protection. For example, if a bird or other like predator pecks at or attacks the crab, the crab’s exoskeleton serves as armor, as a barrier from and against the blows.

This same structure, because of its inflexibility, also (ironically) becomes a ceiling for growth and development of the organism.

The crab intuitively knows that, in order to grow, it must back out of its shell. This is what the crab, in fact, does.

The process of shedding the exoskeleton is called molting. As reported by Brian Handwerk of National Geographic News, "They pump themselves up and inflate their gut, and that increased pressure will cause the old outer skeleton to crack, so that the crab can back out of it."

The only problem is, now without a protective skeleton, the crab is open to attack; it is now vulnerable. However, if it were to remain within it’s restrictive shell, it would suffocate.

So it is with us.

We’re trained (particularly men) that vulnerability is the ultimate death, that it will pierce the heart, leaving us disgraced and pitiful.

What if I stumble over my elevator speech?
What if they find out I'm really not an expert?
What if they say 'No'?

But, what if you were to outgrow your armor? What could you do, have, or be if you refused to suffocate in your protective shell?

When you decide to live your life authentically and honestly by discarding your exoskeleton, you are indeed more open to attack. All of those what-ifs swirling around in your head just might happen.

At the same time, however, it’s simply not possible to grow and become all you are meant to be by staying where you are.

What might you be holding onto (in the name of protection or self-preservation) that may be keeping you from realizing your dreams?

What might be wonderful about letting that go?

Tshombe is a Spiritual Business Coach who specializes in helping independent sales professionals release themselves from struggle and to easily attract only their perfect clients.

Find him online at www.TheMagneticEntrepreneur.com.

Learn more about the author, Tshombe Brown.

Comment on this article

Posted by Judy Dunn, Seattle, Washington | Mar 05, 2009

Wow, Tshombe. What incredible insights here. And, being a storyteller myself, I love the way you have used the crab to illuminate what you are teaching us here.

I like the Latin origins of the word "vulnerable." To wound, how perfect. Until we make ourselves open to being "wounded," we cannot fully develop as humans.

Back in my teaching days, when a student (especially when I worked in the gifted program) would ask me something I didn't have the answer to, I would say,

"I don't know the answer to that but it's a very good question. How do you think we could find out?"

My students loved it because I was not the bossy, "teacher as authority," and they got to be part of the solution.

Personally, I don't like the word "expert" because there is not one person in the world who has the answers to everything, even within a narrow field or topic.

You have given us so much to think about here. Thanks for sharing.
Posted by Rev. Elke Siller Macartney, LaConner, Washington | Mar 05, 2009

In my experience as entrepreneur and human being, my greatest growth came from being authentically myself, which at times meant vulnerable--showing my weaker underbelly so to speak.

I often find great compassion out there when I tell truths like: "I don't know the answer to that question." ("But maybe we can discover it together.") or "I messed up here" (and learned from it.) I also find that some clients drop out or criticize me. Yet do I really want to prop myself up (or armor myself like an old crab) in order to pander to those folks? Nope. Authenticity keeps me flexible.

Judy has some good points: having students or clients be part of the solution is much more empowering than acting like one knows all the answers. So, I would like to suggest another word instead of "expert": Maven. A maven knows just enough to be confident in their field. A maven backs out of his or her shell when he/she is ready to grow.

Keep on writing, fellow maven.

a wise woman for wise people
Posted by Jon St.Marie, Seattle, Washington | Mar 05, 2009

I really liked this. I was just telling my teenage daughter about how she can have many "careers" in her life...take the time to shed one skin for another...take the risks, be vulnerable and GROW into a new and better person all of your life. One more observation about crabs...they're good eatin'! JON
Posted by Shahrad Milanfar, Emeryville, California | Mar 05, 2009

Tshombe,

Thanks for sharing. Great article.

Staying in our comfort zone is the easy thing to do. Often times, when we put things in perspective, stepping out of our shell becomes much easier. In reality, most fears and protection measures are minor in the grand scheme of things. One way to deal with pressure is to ask a simple question: Would this event be stressful or difficult, if I was going to die today?

The answer is always the same.

All the best,

Shahrad Milanfar Mediator & Counselor At Law
Posted by Rev. Elke Siller Macartney, LaConner, Washington | Mar 05, 2009

PS: Definition of Maven, from wikipedia: "A maven is a trusted expert in a particular field, who seeks to pass knowledge on to others. The word "maven" comes from the Yiddish, and it means one who accumulates knowledge."

Hmmm..must be a lot of mavens here on biznik!

Hmmm again, this maven might have to write about this.... Not that I'm an expert or anything... :>)

Thanks again Tshombe

a wise woman for wise people
Posted by Sonia Connolly, Portland, Oregon | Mar 05, 2009

Thanks for this article, Tshombe! I love seeing authenticity and vulnerability brought to business contexts.

For me, a lot of that shell is constructed of "shoulds" - as long as I can find out what I "should" be doing, and do it, I can't get hurt, right? It's a lot scarier and more vulnerable to find my own pathway through the business world, and allow myself to be different.

Ironically, marketing is all about being visible, and differentiating ourselves. I'm learning and growing as I find out what that looks like for me.

Thanks again for a great article!

Sonia | Sundown Healing Arts | TraumaHealed.com
Posted by Caelan Huntress, Portland, Oregon | Mar 05, 2009

Time to get crackin!

Thanks, Tshombe!
Posted by Ken Peters, Phoenix, Arizona | Mar 06, 2009

Tshombe,

A very creative approach to a wonderful message.

I learned a long time ago that you have to put yourself out there, and dare to fail fabulously.

I'm inspired, and I also suddenly have a hankering for seafood :)

Ken Peters | Nocturnal Graphic Design Studio
Posted by Tshombe Brown, Portland, Oregon | Mar 07, 2009

Judy, I really appreciate your comments and especially how you went on to articulated exactly what struck you in the article and why.

You also added and enhanced the article by illustrating how "being vulnerable" doesn't necessarily have to be painful.

In fact, it can -- as in the case of admitting that you don't know the answer and that as a group we can together benefit from collective knowledge-creation in the moment -- assist in the development of critical thinking skills and the academic skills of everyone concerned.

Words often have subjective meaning, and I think I understand your point about no one knows everything and that learning is an ongoing process. However, the word "expert" doesn't convey to me the idea of having the answers to everything.

For many entrepreneurs, it's the lack of feeling 'good enough' that keeps them in their proverbial crab shell (I speak to this tendency in my Rapunzel Complex article), rather than embracing unabashedly their expert status.

At the very least, each one of us is an expert on ourselves (even though I, for one, am progressively learning more about who I am!). In fact, Judy, I see you have embraced your 'expert-ness' by claiming for yourself the "Expert Copywriter & Blogger" designation!

Bravo!

Thank you, Silke, for defining "Maven" for us. I erroneously thought of "Maven" as exclusively and inherently feminine.....like "Lady" or "Woman," for example.

It's enlightening to see both "expert" and "one who accumulates knowledge" used in the same context when referring to "Maven." Therefore, an expert is not some know-it-all after all!

Hi Jon, Isn't is amazing how synchronicity happens to reinforce and confirm our life lessons, if we're paying attention? Sounds like your daughter has a great dad!

Shahrad, what wise comments! We have amazing imaginations that are both a blessing and a curse. For the most part, what we imagine an outcome to be is far worse that the reality of it. Usually, in fact, the rewards far outweigh the price of admission.

You also offer a great tool: I love your get-you-to-stop-and-think simple question......and answer! Thank you, Shahrad

Sonia, I'm so pleased the article resonated profoundly with you. I'm even MORE delighted that you are so in sync with the concepts in the article that you are a living example of them! Keep up the good work and great example. Thank you!

Hey Caelan, is there such a thing as a crab shell cracker? My mother's side of the family is from Alabama and my aunt (especially) makes a mean gumbo, complete with large and plentiful crab legs. We always used a nut cracker to crack the crab legs........

I love that expression, Ken: "Dare to Fail Fabulously!"

(Though I prefer to believe there is no failure -- only feedback.)

So glad you are inspired to (as Caelan expressed) "get crackin!"

Sales Success Tele-Interview Series
Posted by Tshombe Brown, Portland, Oregon | Mar 07, 2009

Sorry about calling you Silke when your name is Elke! How embarrassing! Must have somehow combined your first and middle names (?)!! :)

Sales Success Tele-Interview Series
Posted by Rev. Elke Siller Macartney, LaConner, Washington | Mar 07, 2009

I dunno, Tshombe...perhaps its my out-of-my-shell Superstar name! hehehe.

a wise woman for wise people
Posted by Aubrie Abbott, Portland, Oregon | Mar 07, 2009

Wonderful. Beautifully written and inspiring. Plus I learned something science related - always love that! :)
Posted by Tshombe Brown, Portland, Oregon | Mar 08, 2009

Thanks Aubrie! So glad it was simultaneously inspiring AND informative.

Sales Success Tele-Interview Series
Posted by Joe Shirley, Seattle, Washington | Mar 12, 2009

Tshombe, wow! This is a fabulous article. Being born in the sign of Cancer, I can relate. And having become almost addicted to the thrill of busting out of yet another shell, I can also attest to the wisdom of sometimes sticking with what you've got and running with it. At least until you get out of the intertidal zone and into safer waters. (It's a lesson I'm trying to learn...)
Posted by Lori Richardson, Bellingham, Washington | Mar 13, 2009

Tshombe. I really enjoyed this article. It is different and offers a great analogy for business owners (and humans in general) to think about. How about a series, with lobsters and salmon?

Corporate sales coach, author, fundraising auctioneer
Posted by Cheryl Dixon, Sandy, Oregon | Mar 19, 2009

Tshombe. You are a relevant and gifted writer to be sure. I am the daughter of a "crabber" and know crabs to be the clean up crew of the ocean floor. We could learn even more from the little "pinchers" by becoming better scavengers ourselves. Crabs and the enviornment, another fine subject to relate to our business-minded interests. Better yet, I think I can truthfully put on a great event on how to become a "scavenger", I'll even add a Fashion Show to the event! See how great you are in getting us to think in a new way! Be blessed! Cheryl
Posted by Brent Haeseker, Ocala, Florida | May 20, 2009

Nice post Tshombe. Probably the best metaphor I've read on personal growth and taking risks in business. No pain, no gain.