Metaphysics of Business, Part 6: Path or Distraction?

How many times have I heard from my clients, friends, even my very own self: “I want to write a book” or  "I want to make my living as a (Fill in the blank)." or "I want my business to succeed." These desires are often immediately followed by the qualifiers "but" or "when", as in, "But I need more time." or "When I have enough money to invest..." or  "But nobody will buy it." or "When the economy is better...".  I could go on, but perhaps you detect a pattern: Earnest desire + qualifying statement = It’s not going to get done. Admit it, how many times have you set yourself on a new path--a healthier diet and exercise program, a new business venture, the start of a book or other creative project--and then had innumerable distractions get in the way of your great intendeds? Ok, I’ll be the first to admit this, since I am actually writing this article because I need to examine this: I have a tendency to drop my well intended projects and paths because I allow too many distractions to get in my way. So, how to actually follow through and "get er done"? If you look at the lives and creations of successful business people or creatives, you will often see a mighty effort to overcome the distractions in their lives and focus on the goal. Writers talk about the many drafts of a book or many attempts at getting published. "Overnight sensations" in sports, acting or music often speak of the hard work it took before the "overnight" fame. There aren’t too many role models out there who create instant manifestations of life-long dreams without the prerequisite actions, dramas, trial and error, more actions, focus, drive, etc. Personal case study: Many years ago, I knew I had a book in me based on the teachings of a course a colleague and I put together called Be YourSelf Boldly. I loved teaching the course, and I felt like I had internalized most of its principles. The colleague was gravely ill and on his way to death when I rushed to his bedside to ask: "Bob, Be YourSelf Boldly would make a wonderful book, do I have your permission to write it?" This emaciated and weak man all of a sudden sat up in bed, eyes blazing at me: "YES!" he stated emphatically, "But you have to promise me, make it your own!" A promise I tearfully pledged to the dying man. Yet when it came time to actually write the book, there was my considerable doubt that I was up to the task, and a lot of staring at a blank piece of paper or computer screen. Life’s distractions started to "intercede". I was a young mom at the time, and that took up a lot of time, but I found more activities to take me away from my staring contest with the blank paper: I volunteered in the neighborhood, I got involved in no less than three different people’s life-dramas, taking each one on personally; I even made up stuff to do that did not really need doing...anything, anything to distract me from writing Be YourSelf Boldly. One day, after my complaining about the book not happening, a friend suggested, "Elke , you are such a good speaker, and talk so well about the concepts in Be YourSelf Boldly, why don’t you just “speak the book?” I was stunned by her suggestion...was this too easy? So I told her to ask me a question, any question about life: and she asked "What is truth?" I quickly got into a quiet, focused mode, and methodically answered the question. She transcribed what I said and a chapter of Be Yourself Boldly was born. After that, I was on The Path of Writing a Book, and almost nothing got in my way. For instance, while watching my kids play at a playground, I would bring along a tape recorder, ask my self intriguing questions, and answer them. Once on the path, it took nine months from start to finish and published by a publishing house. It was an amazing creation. Here’s what I‘ve discovered: 1. As much as you can, discern your purpose in the world. Then act out of that purpose. Once I am on a path that holds my attention and matches my purpose, almost nothing can get in my way. So the "trick" is to find that purpose; then the path  to pursue it will unfold naturally. 2. Find your core distractions. Ask yourself: What distracts me from my path? A personal example for me is as follows: I get involved. Yup, that’s it in a nutshell. I tend to get involved in other people’s lives and battles, as well as projects. I often think it is my duty to get involved, especially when a person is being hurt or misjudged in some way. Now, this is a very good trait of mine as well...I mean, being my brother’s/sister’s keeper is a path of compassion, which honors what I strive to be: a compassionate human being. But I cannot even count the times I’ve overstayed my welcome, and even got myself entangled in a way that was destructive to me and my family. So too with my involvement in other people’s projects: As I’ve admitted in an earlier article, I had the tendency to get involved in other’s projects, thinking that maybe my involvement will give me what I need to then work on my own projects: They’ll make the money to fund what I want, or give me the contacts needed, or...  And all of this might be true--that is what makes these distractions so pernicious. It is only after I am involved in the distraction for awhile that I begin to realize it is not supporting my path or purpose...at all. And by then it is often too late to extricate myself.  So now I know: My main distraction is my getting involved too much in others’ lives and dreams to the detriment of my own life and dreams. I catch myself in the act sooner nowadays. So, my friend,  I ask you: What are some of your main distractions? 3. Here is the crucial question to ask when looking at any action, any step, any choice in front of you as you proceed on your intended path: "Is this on my path or is it a distraction?" Listen to your initial answer; it is probably the correct one, so don’t try to second guess it. Second guessing often leads to qualifications and reasons not to trust your answer, hence leading to further distractions. 4. Trust that you know whether you are on the path…or not.  The times I see the greatest confusion in my clients and in myself is when we do not trust our own intuitive sense about the path we are on. Confidence in one’s knowing comes with practice. Keep asking the above question, even breaking it down to a simple, "Path or distraction?" And then trust your answer. Trust your path. Trust that the universe will support you in your own dreams. Now, go and get ‘er done! 2009-05-09T17:55:50Z

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2009-05-10T20:44:56Z

2009-05-10T20:45:17Z

The path to creating a successful business is rife with distraction. Find yours and get back on the trail!