Seattle Community

Laura Lavigne
Speaker, author and life coach
Anacortes, Washington
Greatly helpful
out of 10
3 votes

Please Hit "Refresh"

How hitting 'refresh' in our lives, in our businesses could very well reveal some amazing data.
Written Mar 14, 2009, read 815 times since then.


“I love how Marco and Tanissa get along so well”

Did I just hear this?

Did Chris, who has spent more time with my family in the last year than just about anyone else really just say that?

He did.

And his words have sent me spinning.

For years, actually for close to a decade, being in the same room as my son and his sister had been a real challenge. The kind of challenge that makes you think twice about taking them both to the grocery store with you. The kind of challenge that makes you feel the peace in a palpable way when one of them is at a friend’s home for the night. The kind that makes your mommy heart - not to mention your mommy nerves - brittle and edgy. And pained.

These two had been so very close as babies and as toddlers. Only 27 months apart, they moved and thought as one person ... until Tanissa started 1st grade. And then, something happened. Maybe it was the new separation, maybe a dose of competition set in too, I don’t know. The fact is that for the next 9 years or so, they seem to barely be able to stand each other’s company. They argued, they bickered, they pushed, they shoved, they tattled. It was no fun.

For some reason, respite seemed to take place magically every time we went on vacation, though. For a while, on the road or under a tent, I got to experience the delight of my amazing kids ... being amazing around each other. Maybe being in a neutral territory did the trick, maybe the sense of adventure rallied them together, I am not sure. But when that happened, life was really, really good.

And funny enough, this is how life has been the last couple of years.

Only thing is, I did not notice.

Ok. That's not completely true. My body noticed. My nerves noticed. My heart noticed. But somehow, I don't think my brain fully did. If you had asked me how my two older kids got along, I am embarrassed (and sad) to say that I would have most likely told you that well, they didn't.

It took another, fresher set of eyes to get me to hit “Refresh.”

It took another voice for me to stop for a moment and bring my own eyes up to date. To take a look at what is, NOW. Wow.

They do get along beautifully well. They are close friends with an obvious sense of strong complicity. As teenagers, these two have found their bond again... and I almost missed it.

All this because I did not hit “Refresh”, that magical little button that lives on our computer screen. That wise little click that allows us, just like that, to look at life in the latest, freshest, most up to date way. And then to live - to act - according to that.

Without it, I wonder: what else am I missing, in my life and in my business?

When we hold ourselves and others to “the way we were”, even possibly to “the way we’ve always been”, we cheat ourselves from so much. We cheat ourselves from “what IS.”

And there is a good chance that “what is” is really good.  

So here’s to us and to our own willingness to hit “Refresh”. Often. 

And here is to giggly teenagers and to being awake enough to truly see them.

Learn more about the author, Laura Lavigne.

Comment on this article

  • finance 
Vancouver, Washington 
Sue Turcotte
    Posted by Sue Turcotte, Vancouver, Washington | Mar 15, 2009

    What a 'refresh-ing' article to read! Eckhart Tolle would applaud likely you for getting to the heart of his teachings. Thank you, Laura.

  • Speaker, author and life coach 
Anacortes, Washington 
Laura Lavigne
    Posted by Laura Lavigne, Anacortes, Washington | Mar 15, 2009

    Thank you, Sue.

    I could not think of a higher compliment!


  • I Teach Clairvoyants and Other Sensitive Souls 
Seattle, Washington 
Madeline Hartman
    Posted by Madeline Hartman, Seattle, Washington | Mar 16, 2009

    We all get so stuck in our usual ruts. Your article is a great reminder that every day is a Brand New Day if we let it be so. Thanks!