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Danielle Miller
Coach/Consultant
Quarryville, Pennsylvania

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Ten Rules for Courageous Confident Women

Ten Rules that successful, professional women know to create the life they crave.
Written Jul 05, 2011, read 2695 times since then.
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I have coached many brilliant, successful women and I have found that while each is unique, there are qualities and characteristics that they all share.  Which ones resonate with you?

Know thyself.  Feedback, input, guidance, mentoring…all vitally important to brilliant women BUT, no one knows you like you.  Finding your authentic voice and listening to your intuition should always be the barometer for your next steps.  Trust it, it will never steer you wrong.  When you live authentically, honoring who you are, courage and confidence are natural ingredients and increase exponentially.

You are enough.  You’re smart, talented to the stars and back, but you find yourself second guessing your capabilities and allowing that mean lil’ devil girl on your shoulder to poke you with her pitchfork of fear, insecurity, doubt, and limiting beliefs.  You wait, feeling that you are not quite ready, when in fact you are more ready than you know.  Courageous confident women know that they will feel fear and uncertainty, but push forward in spite of it, knowing that mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow.  You have infinite and priceless worth in your authentic self

Clarity Is Queen.  You know exactly what you want (and what you don’t want); you are aware of when your values and priorities change and adjust accordingly.  Being afraid to say what you want and declare it does not serve you.  Courageous confident women have their own personal blueprint for success.  Clarity is personal power squared.

Balance Does Not Exist.  In honoring all the wonderful pieces of you, you know that the traditional term of balance does not exist.  Balance indicates no motion; when a scale is perfectly proportioned it doesn’t move.  Your life is about proportion, equilibrium, seasons, and ebbs and flows.  In reality, balance should be redefined as a blend of your life, not pieces of a pie that must be divided equally.  True balance is about flexibility, adaptability, and course corrections on your personal compass.

Thou Shall Practice Self Care.  Eating well, getting enough sleep, exercising, taking time to feed and nourish your body, spirit and soul are your divine rights.  Successful women make themselves a priority and not an option.  Practicing self care is allows you to stretch, grow and learn; as well as providing you with comfort, cozy rituals, and time to decompress and recharge.  Courageous confident women show the world that they respect and love themselves.

This Too Shall Pass.  Courageous confident women know that there will be challenging, trying, and the ‘valley of shadow’ times in their lives, but they do not dwell on them nor do they live in the past or worry about the future.  They do not fixate on the things that they do not have the power to change and look for solutions in what they can control.  They focus on the present and what the priorities are here and now.

The Sky Is Beyond the Limit.  Dreaming big is a state of mind.  Why not you?  Why can’t you live your biggest, most audacious, bodacious dreams and desires?  Successful women know that ‘playing big’ has nothing to do with quantifying bigness and everything to do with the quality of bigness.  The key is knowing making sure your values are in alignment with your dreams.  They are the soul twins of playing big.  Courageous, confident women are optimistic, expansive in their thinking, and know that manifesting and action go together.

Follow Thy Passion.  The most illuminated and brilliant women heed the call of their passion.  It may not be loud trumpets sounding or angels singing; it may be a quiet voice that keeps trying to be heard in your soul.  It may not appear as a job or a career; it may feel like a calling or a vocation.  However it appears to you, it is irresistible in its siren song.  Courageous confident women know there may not be one grand passion, but a ‘portfolio of passions’, it’s about creating a ledger of legacy that reflects the gifts, value and service you bring to the world.

Surround Thyself with Success.  Brilliance begets brilliance.  Believe it and it will rub some sparkly light on you.  One of my mentors refers to this as your Jedi Council.  These are the people that are role models, coaches, supporters, and encouragers.  These Jedi Knights aid and abet in your awesomeness.  They show you the possibilities that you don’t see in yourself.  They may be near and dear to you or people you’ve never even met.   They inspire, motivate, and kick your gorgeous little tush when needed.  Courageous confident women have a wise council of like minded Jedis on their side.

Energy In=Energy Out.  You are the Energy Force in your life.  Everything (people, activities, thoughts) either give you energy or drain it from you.  The whole concept of imbalance (see Commandment 4) is created because you are doing too many activities that drain you.  Courageous confident women know that to live their ideal life they must create boundaries, learn to say a gracious no, and continually seek the energy giving moments.

Live in the infinite beauty and possibilities of who you are. 

Learn more about the author, Danielle Miller.

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