Work-life balance

One of the most important things for anyone to do to balance their life is get massages on a regular basis.

Or any kind of healing for that matter.

I think the best thing for me to do to balance my life and work is to get in touch with my priorities in different ways.

It's one thing, for example, to write out "all serious" what my priorities in life are... it's another to take into account that there are many situations and sides to life.

I have many sides, many needs and many different and juxtapose priorities.

I need to check my email...

I need to sit in my bath tub and make bubble bath castles...

it's all important.

One just has to get their heads out of work long enough to realize they can't take it with them... not the good, not the bad.

To continue to beat oneself with the productivity stick is to decrease the value of their service.

This seems to be the common experience I see in over-workers. They have more dissapointments, more wasted time on useless connections and less inner and outer resources to keep their cool when the snot hits the fan.

Self care is what I give for a living.

It is wretched, what a lack of self care does to the common man.

It's a hideous twisted version of a fulfilling life, based on collective consciousness' idea of what your standard should be...

or worse... your personal life sucks so much that you work to escape it, accomplishing only more avoidance in your personal affairs and makes your business persona a thin smear of "pretty" over huge ugly ball of unresolved issues, past trauma and poor personal relationship management.

Personal relationships, even to the most extreme business person, are vital and critical to having a full and satisfying life. To put them so far behind in priority compared to ones business life as a modus Operandi... is, to me, like having a buffet of delicious choices and choosing to take only the rice and beans and nothing else.

It feeds you, it feeds your family, but it does not feed your soul like friends, family, lovers and personal creative and connectivity time with self feeds your soul.

I love what I do. But I think balance and making time for my healing, my personal life and my totally free and easy time needs, is essential to giving great service in my business and being a Real connectable and beautiful human being when i network and connect.

but that's just my opinion... I could be wrong.

Work-life balance has different interpretations, but in general, you have to learn to let go & get away from it all.

Keep a sense of variety in your life. Balance the often harsh demands of a changing job or workplace with imaginative hobbies and enjoyable recreation.

There's no one size fits all type of balance to strive for,like a rigid number of set hours for each activity or type of work, life should be more fluid than that.

Strive for achievenment & enjoyment in family, self, work & friends. When you are more in tune with reality you can achieve more with less effort. When you are able to find that right mix it will help you to refine your goals & hasten you towards them.

You can take control of your "work-life" balance, so that you can have more time for the things that are important to you. Work can invade your personal life but you have to know when to set boundaries.

Getting your priorities clear is the first and most important step toward achieving a well-balanced life. When you have a more concrete idea of what matters to you then you may discover that you may be spending too much time on activities that aren't a priority, then you can make adjustments accordingly.

But the boundaries are unclear or blurred for some people. When you recognize how the world of work has changed then you can evaluate your relationship to work then apply some specific strategies for striking a more fluid healthier balance.

I agree, Renee, very well put.

It seems as tho there's two realities to integrate: the fluid and the rigid.

IN someways, rigidity will achieve success and balance.

In someways, flowy sweetness will achieve and support balance.

One thing that I know about myself is that I have a ton of diverse interests and desires that pull me and that I could be committed to.

I find that when I am aware of one of my priorities - and it's one I often do not remember during times of work or stress or thru life being lived - I figure out some way to remind myself of it.

I often use the whole "note to myself on the wall"

something like:

Remember to take time to be quiet and still - peace is there, beauty is there - it will fill you with resources to deal with stress.

I also make notes and post pictures up on my wall of places I have been or places I want to go for holiday.

I think there's a need for tools and help when it comes to the work-life balance.

That's why coaches like Lisa Bradley or Kate Philips are so essential to one's evolution, growth and focus on balance and such.

Coaches are like the fitness trainers of the mind (and other parts that are non-physical)

I go for counseling and coaching as my "big guns" for keeping in balance.

Sierra,

It's good to have that outlet, that resouce to go to that will help you to see things clearer & think things through, when you can't sort out or achieve that right mix or balance.

When you have that, it helps you to define the direction that you want to go in, set a clearer path, so that you will know where you are going.

Some people have too much on their plate, a too much to-do list and may not even realize it until it is too late. So they crash & burn. There has got to be some relief there, an outlet.

Some people should learn to take time for themselves & learn to leverage the resources of others to help them through some of the exciting but busy times in their life.

Doing that can help you to add balance, focus & organization to your busy life.

Writing, believe it or not, is something I for life fun. My radio show as well. But I also enjoy painting and playing video games and reading detective fiction.

This is a struggle for most of us. Since organization is so important, I am a firm believer in a system to ensure you make time for yourself, your family and friends. I prepare a schedule. For example, I schedule in my exercise on my calendar, massages once a month, all my nail appointments are scheduled well in advance, as well as my hair appointments, lunch with a friend once every two weeks, lunch with husband every three weeks, and date nights. We are also very good about getting our vacations scheduled and on our calendars, including at least three or four weekend get aways. I enjoy writing and schedule that for first thing in the morning, before the phone starts ringing. Emails can be very time consuming, so I schedule times during the day when I look at them. I agree with the others, that you have to decide what is important to you and then, figure out what works for you to make it happen. And we need to stop feel guilty for taking time for yourselves.

Great comments. Awareness of priorities and a framework for managing time (schedule) provides the structure for balance.

We live in a time and place filled with marketing mumbo jumbo aimed at creating demands and driving our priorities, our schedules, and every other aspect of our lives.

I like routines. In my daily routine I schedule time for reflection. In reflection I contemplate whether I am experiencing balance in my life, what my priorities are and why, whether I am consistently staying on a path that will take me where I want to go, and most importantly whether I am cultivating awareness and staying present while doing the doing of life. (Having routines also allows me to "schedule" spontaneity, like when I go to a Biznik event and basically allow for whatever happens to happen. And yes, Veronica, we deserve time for ourselves.)

In this way things don't get too far out of balance without me becoming aware of it and making the necessary "adjustments."

Thanks for you comments.

I like to run, watch basketball, read, and shop! And once upon a time I used to do some acting, though I haven't lately...

Veronica, super impressed by your level of organization!! How do you do it?

Kaya, good question, thanks for it. Will be checking out your 8 parts of a business because it looks quite intriguing! :)

Katie, I have always had a million things going on, so early on to keep my sanity I developed my own way of dealing with the many demands on my time. I blog on organization at www.beautifullyorganized.wordpress.com, where I share my systems. If you are having a problem sticking to a program or schedule, then it isn't the right schedule or system for you. Find what works and you will be amazed how much time you can free up to do the things you love..including acting.

Great to read everyone's responses to Kaya's post.

It's hard to believe that it was 17 years ago - at the age of 35 - that, due to work related stress, I was a "heart attack waiting to happen." I think that's a major wake-call for any independent business person. It was a situation where it was NECESSARY to make changes in my life.

I had to re-evaluate how I did operated my business, what was truly important to me, and how I wanted to create and spend "off" time. One of the first things I did was adopt a "work less, charge more" business attitude. Eventually that led to my "summer office hours" of Monday-Thursday, 8:00-5:00, becoming my year-round hours of operation. Fridays are my day to do as I please - and that may involve some work-related activities - but I have no client contact on that day.

One of the most dramatic changes in creating a work-life balance for myself was a very simple physical change in my home-based office. I installed a French door, where there had been no door previously, at the base of the stairs leading to my office. When I come down in the evening and shut the door the office is closed for the day. That door helped me to realize I shouldn't always be working when my partner was home from work, if I valued my personal relationship. With my partner currently working on an MBA I do have a bit more flexibility with that "rule." However, personal time does take a priority over working ALL the time.

Gardening has become a major hobby - and my best/favorite form of therapy. I read a great deal - usually with three or four very different types of books in progress at one time. Writing is relaxing for me and - as I start writing book number three - in writing articles, blogs, or books I find the time flexibility for such efforts contributes to a balance in my life.

Travel is a passion - in fact, I'm leaving for a two week trip to Hawaii this weekend. With a partner having 6-8 weeks of paid vacation a year, I adjust my business life to be able to enjoy annual trips to St. Croix, camping, a yearly gold-mining trip with friends and other adventures. Trips for conference and speaking engagements are almost always mixed with taking some personal time to enjoy a variety of locations. With internet capabilities I can tend to necessary business from wherever I may be in the world.

It is so much about "working to live," rather than "living to work."

Jeff Fisher | Jeff Fisher LogoMotives | Tweet! Tweet!

Get out of the house, and get an inspiring office!

This has been the biggest improvement in my work life balance. Working from home, while convenient and cheap, means that you never leave work. I used to check my first email about 8 am and find myself still at it at 10 pm or later because I'm such a "do it now" guy. Yet, I really didn't get that much done.

With all the distractions of home (anything will do) it's easy to put in long hours with little productivity. At the office, there is nothing really to do other than work (with an occasional Internet distraction) so I find I get more accomplished.

Now I have a very cool open loft space with high ceilings and big windows that I go to every day. It's a coworking space that I share with 4 other companies so it's cheap and I don't feel isolated (we have space for more people right now - contact me if you are interested and I'll put you in touch with the landlord!)

I've also built in an early morning workout since my gym is next door to the office. I never thought I'd become a "morning person" but it has done wonders for getting the day jump started and now I can leave around 5 pm feeling that I did my business justice for the day.

Kaya-

A couple of things... I don't check email at night or on weekends. I get a pedicure monthly and a massage quarterly. I only participate in tasks and activities that are truly important to me, my family, friends or my business. My husband and I are both business owners so we try to keep our biz conversation limited and make sure we are talking about other things.

Finally, I have learned to say no to stay sane. Hope that helps – great question!

Christa

Kaya-

Good for you - whatever works. I love communication too, but I sometimes I have to detox from communication overload.

Christa

Since I started my own business, I'm discovering that I spend hours and hours growing it. Because I'm sitting in front of the computer screen for so long each day, I've made a few rules for myself:

1. I usually start the day with a stretching routine that my chiropractor gave me;

2. If I don't stretch on one day, I take at least a minimum half-hour walk in the middle of the day to get out of the house - maybe buy lunch out somewhere;

3. Our cat likes to sit on the desk return so he's always nearby for a petting break;

4. As many weekends as possible, we go birdwatching. As well as getting some exercise, we are out in nature, we are quiet so that we don't scare away the birds, and we get to appreciate (and sometimes even photograph) their beautiful plumage;

5. Finally, I network - I'm finding that I really enjoy "meeting" others on-line and sharing experiences, hopes, frustrations, advice, etc.

Best regards, Phyllis Harber-Murphy CAP More Than 9 2 5 Virtual Assistant

Hi there Kaya,

I just joined BizNik and the first conversation I clicked on was one you started!

My hobby is Balkan dancing and singing. I devote a lot of time to it and run my own group, because it connects me with other people and simply makes me happy. It helps me balance the isolation of running my own business.

I hope your Holiday Affair goes really well!

Sonia Connolly

Helping people heal from trauma TraumaHealed.com

I am going to add on to Sonia's comment. I am a long time practicioner of Soma Massage and it really fills me to learn all I can about the body/mind connection.

It is my work but also my pleasure. I also walk, relax and spend time with my friends. Soma is so exciting that I actually relax as I learn more.

I am wishing all my friends and family a happy New Year and that act of checking in is also a good balance. There is still a lot of hope out there and that is so good to hear.