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<span class="basic_member_name">Jim Bursch</span>
Jim Bursch
Marketing
Los Angeles, California
Posted by Jim Bursch, Los Angeles, California | Jun 02, 2009

Subscribe to Starting a business Investment funding aborts innovation or The best truffles grow in purple cow dung

Over the last four years of developing MyMindshare, I would periodically think that this would be a lot easier if I could hire somebody else with genuine expertise to do some of the work. Most recently, I think that I need to raise funds to hire a marketing team.

When I start thinking like that, the next step is to write a business plan. Naturally, potential investors want to know how much money I need, how it is going to be spent, and how money will be made, or an “exit strategy.”

Bullshit. To raise funding from outside investors, I need bullshit to put into a business plan. Not too much bullshit, but just enough bullshit.

Because if I knew enough to write a business plan with no bullshit, I wouldn’t need outside investment.

The function of a business plan is to demonstrate skill at bullshitting. Not just any form of bullshitting, mind you, but the specific form of bullshitting in which venture capitalists like to root around. There is a hierarchy based on the quality of bullshit that venture capitalists stick their nose into. I suspect that the highest quality bullshit is produced by Stanford MBAs backed by Stanford Ph.Ds and their truffles are a delicacy most appreciated by the connoisseurs on Sand Hill Road.

But I’m not complaining. Bullshit is better than nothing, and good bullshit is better than bad bullshit if you are in the investment crap shoot.

I’m just not a very good bullshitter, and this is a good thing for MyMindshare. Because I suck at bullshitting, I have to innovate. If I had received any significant funding to solve my perceived problems prior to now (and into the foreseeable future), innovation would have ceased. MyMindshare would have been turned over to the experts in conventional wisdom because there is no such thing as an expert in innovation. By the time you reach expert status in anything, it is no longer innovative.

That’s why you have to bullshit in your business plan when you are innovating. You have to claim expertise on a foundation that is entirely self-referential, or make disingenuous references to conventional wisdom. People who are good at that write business plans. I’m not good at that.

Note on the subtitle:

“The best truffles grow in purple cow dung” is an homage to Seth Godin, who wrote The Purple Cow, All Marketers are Liars, and The Bootstrapper’s Bible.

This post is also blogged here: http://mymindshare.com/blog/?p=237


4 Bizniks have posted replies

  • Biznik Community Tech Support
    Posted by Biznik Community Tech Support, Seattle, Washington | Jun 02, 2009

    Wow... from that perspective, there isn't much room for success, is there?

    A business plan is not magical, nor is it full of "bull shiitake" as Guy Kawasaki calls it. The investor knows more about money than you do, and anything you try to snow him with will make you look dopey. He does this stuff for a living. You don't.

    So the first thing to do is be open and honest.

    Try looking at the problem from the Investor's side: I'm an Investor. I have $1000. I will give it to you if you can show me a credible plan to make it $2000 in 3 months. (Insert whatever numbers you want. Just realize that investors want short-term results. Three $10,000 investments that pay 20% in 3 months are much easier to get than one check for $30,000 that pays 30% in 6 months.)

    You actually know how to deliver that value, whether you realize it or not.

    You already have a product, so you can demonstrate how real world users make use of your product, and you have some stats that you can show.

    You also know what Big Question you are trying to answer. Therefore you can do research for how many people are looking for the answer to that Big Question, what kind of people they are, and what fraction of them might reasonably use your product.

    I'd suggest you read Guy Kawasaki's latest book, Reality Check. It really is the no bull-shiitake guide for how to present your product to investors, done in plain old irreverent English.

    Side Note
    A little over 10 years ago, I also developed an opt-in advertising system like yours. I called it "AdChoice.com".

    Unfortunately, I was about 11 years ahead of my time (it seems), and nobody believed:

    1. companies would allow their employees to have access to the internet from work,
    2. people would ever want to choose who to receive advertising from,
    3. everyone thought blasting ads at people via email was going to be the "tv advertising" model of the Internet.

    Ah well. That's what I get for being from the future!

  • Jim Bursch
    Posted by Jim Bursch, Los Angeles, California | Jun 02, 2009

    I'm a fan of Guy's. I have been guided by "Art of the Start", but I will definitely check out "Reality Check".

    Do you have any guidelines for identifying smart, no-B.S. VC types or Angels?

  • Biznik Community Tech Support
    Posted by Biznik Community Tech Support, Seattle, Washington | Jun 03, 2009

    The best ones you don't find... they find you.

    As you refine your biz plan and get it simple, tight, and focused, with good numbers to back it up, give it to some people to review.

    If it looks like a good idea, they'll tell people about it.

    However, that kind of "plant the seeds and wait" technique doesn't scratch the entrepreneurial itch very well, does it? :-)

    Guy covers all of these questions in Reality Check, but really it is about searching, asking, and sending the plan along to a variety of ventures. Heck... maybe even Guy's Garage Ventures might be interested!

    The core is that good ideas get talked about. Everyone likes to tell other people about the cool story / product they just heard about. If you make it easy for them to talk about it, then they'll tell their friends. And one of those friends will want to know a LOT more about it...

    In the terms of The Tipping Point, you are looking for the Connectors that will get you to the right person. Just make sure your Connectors have an easy, sound-bite friendly way of talking about what you do. (You can discuss the details with anyone that nibbles when they hear the sound bite.)

  • Jim Bursch
    Posted by Jim Bursch, Los Angeles, California | Jun 03, 2009

    Excellent! I'm feeling much better about the venture capital route already!

    I have come across a few services that offer to help write a business plan and then get introductions to potential investors -- all for a fee, of course. They make me very suspicious. Do you have any experience with those types of services? What do you think of them?

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