Barak's comments

This is a great article, and timely for me. Earlier this summer I created a demo version of a ten-session audio Treasure Hunt that people are now testing. When I listened to the first takes, I was depressed! I'd been on my high school speech team, went to the national finals, am very comfortable getting up in front of crowds of hundreds and keeping them enthralled. And making a recording was painful.

I went to a great biznik event with Anna Bernstein about using your voice, and that made a huge difference. It took untold hours of practicing, doing it over and over, getting frustrated, keeping up my energy level, but I finally got a great first demo that I was happy with. For the final version that I'll be recording in August, I'll have a small audience of people who are very good at coaxing energy, passion and authenticity out of me.

I can imagine how much work it would be--and how fun--to make this a career.

Sorry to cancel--but it's been 22 years since I've watched the Celtics beat the Lakes in the finals, and first things first . . .

If you have another one I'll be there!

Howard--I'm not going to be able to make this--have an extra meatball for me!

Cool event, Ila!

I can't make it tomorrow--I hope you schedule another one. This is great!

Great event guys! For me, starting to think about biznik in a more holistic sense--and understanding how it relates to search engines--was key. It's a long 2 1/2 hours in that room though. A 5-minute break would have been great.

Howard,

I don't think I'll be there, so I'm canceling--that may change in the morning. I hope someone can take the slot.

Barak

I've known Chris for years--ever since we were in a business networking group that did suck.

We both escaped quickly.

Reading these posts (and it's a testament to Chris that I read not only his article but the comments on it--in addition to heading off to rewrite my biznik profile), I'm starting to see three levels of how people communicate:

1. Communicating from my perspective, from the ego. I do this, I can do that, I'm swell because . . .
2. Communicating with your attention on the listener/reader, focusing on how they will respond. This is a huge upgrade from #1.
3. Speaking and writing from the heart, in your authentic voice, saying what is really there for you to say, offering it to the world to be accepted or not.

Chris clearly writes (and speaks and thinks) from his heart and in his own authentic voice. For some people he will be the teacher and guide they're ready for. For others, not.

If he were to modify his voice, try to make it more gentle, appealing, empathetic--well, it wouldn't be Chris anymore. And his authenticity, power and effectiveness would be greatly diminished.

And for people who need to hear the message in some other form, that's perfect. That's why there are other teachers and thinkers out there. No one speaks to everyone. Speak authentically, and you'll be heard by those meant to hear you.

Oh no, is Haddad, could he be? It can't be true . . . some sort of enlightened marketing Bodhisattva?

Ever notice the glow off his shiny skull?

The best piece of advice I've been given (by several people with different perspectives) is to remember that this is business.

That doesn't mean don't do work for friends or family, don't be unfriendly or un-trusting. What I've learned is that having clear agreements in writing before beginning work are critical. If there is going to be a payment plan, spell it out. If you need 25% to start, write that in. If they get watermarked proofs until final payment is received, make that clear.

That way, if you have an issue in the future, you simply go back to the original signed agreement.

Using a standard agreement in your industry, or one drawn up by your lawyer, is a very good idea. My sister is an attorney and helped me with a large agreement I signed. My version was so full of holes and ambiguities that it was meaningless. In a business relationship, clarity is key.

And you don't have to sign an agreement if you're not comfortable with a potential client. You can often tell a lot about how they will be to work with by the way they approach the agreement. If someone looks at it closely, asks a question or two, maybe makes an addition or change, you can bet that they will take it very seriously. Someone you're unsure about who says "yeah, sure, I'll sign that," may be someone to walk away from.

If you get to the point of not getting paid, any of the approaches and strategies people have mentioned make sense in the right situation. The ideal is to build you business and cash flow to the point where you don't have to worry if a client doesn't pay a bill.

Barbara,

I most likely will not be there, so I've cancelled my reservation to give someone else a spot.

If my day re-arranges, I'll check back to see if the slot is still open.

I live around the corner, and look forward to meeting you soon.

Barak

If you want a real boost, write on top of your list "it's not all going to get done, and that's fine."

To-do lists were invented as a management tool back in the day when they would read "Write letter on yellow pad, review letter after it's typed by the secretary, call Mr. Smith, have lunch."

That was before word processors; email (five accounts); cell phones; blackberrys; iPhones; IMs; conference calls; online calendars; shuttling kids to soccer, dance and the math tutor; Home Depot open 'till 10pm! . . .

Instead of asking "what do I have to do?" you can ask "of all the things I could do, what will I spend my time on?"

Great article. Sometimes saying no--and saying why--can be very useful to the person asking as well. It opens up all sorts of opportunities to find more effective ways of getting things done, or cutting out activities that are a waste of time for everyone. Often, when someone says "will you do . . . " they have no idea it will take six hours. Just explaining that often will lead to a "never mind."

Dan and Lara,

Thank you for being so thoughtful about what will help biznik continue to be a vibrant and vital community as it grows. Clear, simple structures and rules don't suck--they will give biznik a stability and flexibility over time.

I've been dealing with Lara on a change in the guidelines for hosting events--it's been some extra work (and a few surprises), and I appreciate very much what you're doing.

Thanks, Barak

About ten years ago I was teaching a ski lesson and saw a father yelling at his very unhappy eight-year old almost nonstop for two hours. "Pizza, no pizza! French fries! Stop! Turn! He was using all of the words we used as instructors, with none of the understanding behind them.

At the end of my lesson I spoke with his wife and suggested some books on teaching kids to ski, if they didn't want to hire a pro. She was almost in tears, saying that she'd tried to get him to stop and he wouldn't. Several other fathers then came to me, thanking me for saying something, and that they were getting close to giving this guy a good smack.

Learning something new requires exploring new patterns--input and output patterns. Our brains form new pathways, networks and relationships that at first are awkward, then seem to flow naturally. As we gain mastery in an area we really are discovering deeper and deeper levels of complexity, then simplicity, then more complexity, and yet deeper simplicity.

The catch is that mastery means that patterns are deeply rooted and don't require conscious thought. Bret can look into the world and the patterns for choosing his depth of field, shutter speed, focus and framing operate invisibly. For him it really is point-and-shoot. Now we really can all point and shoot, except that he does it at a much deeper level. As a Treasure Hunt Guide I listen to the words coming out of someone's mouth and just know what question to ask next. People I train to become guides struggle with that until the patterns become ingrained.

I've finally learned that rather than writing my own copy, designing my own website and creating my own business plan, I can find people who do those things with mastery. Now, I'm in the process of working with writers, a marketing whiz, and business people and can focus on what I do best. The more effective we are, the more people know I'm out there, the less I have to work to get "that next customer" and I can go into any sales conversation with no attachment to the result. We're a match or not.

So here's a Treasure Hunt for anyone who wants one: get curious about the things you are doing in your business that seem like work and struggle.

By getting curious, I mean ponder them, explore them, what are you really doing? What's it feel like when you do them? What goes through your head? What do you do to avoid doing these things? Don't try to fix anything, nothing's wrong here--just be curious.

Nancy,

I'm sorry I'm not going to be able to make it--have a great time!

Barak

I had some cranio-sacral work done a few years ago and it was amazing--I'll put my name in the hopper. Looking forward to it if I make the cut!

Thanks, Barak

I've known Karol for years and have also dealt with hiring foreign workers. Not only will this be useful and informative, knowing Karol it will be a lot of fun and incredibly well presented.

I'm working with a writer on creating a blog as a major part of my new website and know nothing about the blogosphere. Looking forward to learning more, and meeting some new people.