Seeking Calm Amidst the Storm: Cultivating The FOUR A's

When I cannot help but catch the scarcity tension in the air born of real events like the worst market crash since 1929, the most constitutionally abhorrent form of leadership since I don’t know when, the denial of death in the form of global eco-irresponsibility, and the grossest form of greed that now expects to be bailed out (this is something for which I’ve been guilty, by the way, “So sorry, Dad”), I try to practice what I call, The Four A’s: Awakeness, Awareness, Acceptance and Acting skillfully.

What helps a great deal is the guidance of Pema Chodron, author of Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living and The Wisdom of No Escape: A Path to Loving Kindness. Chodron is a Tibetan Buddhist and Abbess at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia and her titles’ say exactly what she means. Though she’s a rigorously-trained Buddhist practitioner and teacher, she offers the rest of us (non-Buddhists, presumably) a very basic philosophy that claims, “the experiences you resist persist.”

But the good news is that there’s a practice one can begin that fosters "working with what arises" without shellacking it. The method is called Tonglen or what some Tibetan Buddhist’s call Lojong (”taking and sending”). How you cultivate this practice amidst the storms in you and all around you goes like this: breathe in the fear and release “not fighting fear.” "Breathe in" the fact that we’re all feeling fear; and, while breathing out, send the wish to self and others (including our perceived enemies) a message that may go something like this: “May we all find a peace and water the roots of peace in our hearts and minds.”Again, not fighting my feelings, not denying the emptiness or hopelessness of the perceived state of the world or denying the “vibes”of what feels like MY current experience in this cultural context.

I know that what I’m experiencing feels real but, this pinched reality of greed, ignorance, and aggression, like all reality in the cycle of living and dying, will not last. I’m sure some of my readers may think this is "gobbly gook" and others may believe this cultural moment is "God’s way of humbling or punishing us." Maybe that’s how it is for her/him. I find life includes me but is not all about me, it’s not happening TO me but FOR us to work with in a more skillful way than we've done in the past. That "skillful way" might include an attitude that arises quite naturally when we’re with a friend/stranger in hospice. We wouldn’t pretend “it’s all groovy,” “let’s focus on the positive,” nor would we say, “you’re totally screwed, my friend!” Rather, we might just BE with our friend, hold his/her hand, wish her/him well and, if we had to speak at all, perhaps say, “I’m here with you, wide awake and aware, not denying anything that comes up in me or in you [acceptance]. Let’s work with IT [action] until there’s no IT to work with.” Again, this Four A’s Approach need not be the way but may simply be a way to practice living with what some people call mindfulness.

If you have tips that help you manage the storms in your life and business, please share them here!