Seeking Calm Amidst the Storm: Cultivating The FOUR A's

When I cannot help but catch the scarcity tension in the air born of real events like: the worst market crash since 1929, the most constitutionally abhorrent form of leadership since I don’t know when, the denial of death in the form of global eco-irresponsibility, and the grossest form of greed that now expects to be bailed out (something for which I’ve been guilty by the way, “So sorry, Dad”), I try to practice what Icall, The Four A’s: Awakeness, Awareness, Acceptance and Actingskillfully.   

What helps a great deal is the guidance of Pema Chodron, author of Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living and The Wisdom of No Escape: A Path to Loving Kindness. Chodron is a Tibetan Buddhist Abbess at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia and her titles’ say exactly what she means. Though she’s a rigorously-trained Buddhist practitioner and teacher, she offers the rest of us (non-Buddhists, presumably) a very basic philosophy that claims, “the emotions you resist persist.”

But the good news is that there’s a practice one can begin that fosters working “with” what arises without shellacking it. The Tibetan Buddhist method is called Lojong (”taking and sending”). How you cultivate this practice amidst the storms (in you andall around you) goes like this: “breathe in” the fear and release throughexhaling “not fighting fear.”

“Breathing in” allows or “takes in” the fact that we are all feeling fear; and, through exhaling we “send out” to all (including your perceived enemies and yourself) a wish that may go something like this: “May we all find a peace and water the roots of peace in our hearts and minds.”

Again, the aim is peace and this is won by NOT fighting. Not fighting my feelings, not denying the emptiness or hopelessness of the perceived state of the world nor denying the “vibes”of what feels like MY current experience in this cultural context. It helps me to know that what I’m experiencing feels real but, this pinched reality of greed,ignorance, and aggression, like all reality in the cycle of living and dying,will not last.

I’m sure some readers may think this is gobbly gook and others may believe this cultural moment is “God’s way of humbling us.” Maybe that’s how it is for her/him. I find life includes me but is not all about me; it’s not happening TO me but FOR us to be with in a skillful, non-ego-grasping (or controlling) way. That skillful way might include an attitude that arises quite naturally when I’m with a friend in hospice.

On such a shared vulnerable occasion, I would not pretend “it’s all groovy,” “let’s focus on the positive,” nor would I say, “you’re totally screwed, my friend!” Rather, I might just BE with my friend, hold his hand, wish her well and, if I had to speak at all,perhaps I would say, “I’m here with you, wide awake and aware, not denying anything that comes up in me or in you [acceptance]. Let’s work with IT [action] until there’s no IT to work with.”

This Four A’s approach need not be the way but may simply be a way to practice living with what some people call mindful compassion–a way that excludes nothing and is touched by everything without getting overwhelmed.

NOTE: Don’t hesitate to checkout my book, Loving Life As It Is. It’s full of meditation techniques to work with whatever arises in your life (bringing calm to your particular storms).

Note to readers: I'd love to hear what's working for you!